I would be delighted if the sea were full of cucumber juice.

Growing up in a family of high performers Stuart changed his mind on a daily basis as to what he wanted to be when he grew up. His siblings, he was one of four, two girls and two boys, made it their daily chore to come up with a new job in order to one up their other siblings. Stuart unfortunately was the youngest and so he had to wait his turn to see if he could come up with a job that outdid the others.

As he grew older, his choice of a profession became more and more exotic, until he reached his final years in high school and his favourite teacher one day asked everyone in turn to stand up in and tell the class what it was they were going to do in life. One was going to be an astronaut, while another a teacher obviously hoping that by saying that they would get extra marks on the final exam and nope, it didn’t work they still failed. Another wanted to be a vet and treat all the sick animals in the world for free, that got several rounds of applause from the other students while David, who was Stuart’s best friend decided that everything everyone said before was pie in the sky and that he was the only one to come up with something more practical.

“An electrician!” he proudly exclaimed.

“An electrician?” everyone including Mr Smith the teacher echoed.

“Why an electrician?” asked Jane who was madly in love with David, but maybe no longer. She had high hopes in life and didn’t want to be married to a mere electrician. Jane was going to be an airline pilot. ‘Yuck,’ she thought to herself. An airline pilot can’t be married to an electrician. Those were simply incompatible. “Well,” explained David who was slightly panicking because he really didn’t want to be an electrician, “my father and grandfather were electricians, and they hope I would follow in their footsteps.”
“Sounds plausible,” replied the teacher after his explanation. And now it was Stuart’s turn. Stuart got up slowly and looked around at everyone who were focused on him and he gulped. The last job he had come up with at home was that of an aircraft engineer, but he hated flying especially because he wasn’t in charge, so he took in a deep breath and mumbled something no one heard, not even himself. He wasn’t sure what he had said. “Speak up Stuart,” said the teacher “I don’t think anyone of us heard what you said.”

“I did,” replied Jane, who had decided Stuart was a better marriage prospect, “he said he wanted to be a deep-sea diver, didn’t you Stuart?”

Thank you, Jane, thought Stuart. “Exactly. I want to be a deep-sea diver.”
“Why a deep-sea diver?” asked the teacher, “what do you hope to find down at the bottom of the ocean?” Well, Stuart wasn’t ready for that question. After all, no one else had been asked to explain their answer except of course for David because he wanted to be an electrician. Well thought Stuart looking over at Jane who he thought might bail him out, but she was of no use. She had no idea what a deep sea diver did. She had overheard her father talking about a deep-sea diver finding gold at the bottom of Sargasso Sea.

“Find gold,” she decided to offer in hope that she scored another winner. Everyones attention turned to Stuart. But Stuart decided he was going to take over. After all, he knew Jane liked David but could see by the look on her face she didn’t approve of David being an electrician. Stuart liked Jane as well, but didn’t think he had a chance with her; that was until she mentioned about him being a deep sea diver.

“Well,” began Stuart taking a deep breath. “No one really knows what’s at the bottom of the ocean. I want to design and build a diving bell that can go about 30,000 feet down without the diver getting injured. In this way, I can find all sorts of things down there.”
“How about sea dragons?” shouted one kid and Stuart agreed, “and sharks,” offered another and soon the class was in an uproar with everyone including the teacher offering their suggestion. But then the subject abruptly changed course when David, the future electrician said, “you know they have electric eels in the ocean. Maybe if one fused you could take me down and I could fix them.”
“Good idea,” replied Stuart understanding that the subject was heading in a bizarre direction, especially when now everyone offered something exotic.

Then Jane said, “you know, they have sea cucumbers.” The class went silent. Everyone looked at Jane. “I love cucumber juice!” she added and that gave the opening Stuart needed. “I would be delighted if the sea were full of cucumber juice, because then you Jane could come on some of my deep-sea dives, that’s when you’re not flying your plane.”

Yes, there was that smile. Stuart had finally scored a winner. “You have a deal!” she shouted and everyone applauded. That is with the exception of David, who realised he was out of luck.

“I could come too,” he offered finally hoping to be included.

“Why?” asked Stuart, “just so you can fix a fused electric eel?”

Everyone burst out in laughter and the teacher clapped his hands, the bell sounded, it was the end of class and Jane mouthed the words, ‘see you outside after school,’ at Stuart. Stuart nodded his head and smiled. Wait till I go home he thought to himself. My siblings will be delighted.